Some things you should know

Say you pull into a parking lot and there's a Saab right in front of you. There's a line of parallel parked cars to your right. The Saab stops beside a Prius and you, being right behind the Saab, now have the empty spot behind the Prius to your right. The Saab puts on reverse lights and also has turned on the right turn signal. There's no one behind you, and right below Park on the tranmission of your Ford Fusion is a strange gear called 'R'. So, what do you do??? Well if you're from Charlotte, you throw your hands up in the air, look behind you, so you're in full knowledge of there being no one behind you, then flail your arms some more in that 'what-the-hell-are-you-doing?' kinda flail. Lady, I hate you with the intensity of a thousand burning stars. Next time, I'm going to stop right there, go up to your window, and give you a lesson on parallel parking, right there in the comfort of your own car. I'll even throw in some lessons on Right-Of-Way. Heck you can even try it right there, and I'll let you know how you did! See, I'm not just complaining, I'm here to help.

Now, one last thing. If you are not a doctor, and not a nurse... Let's say you're a bank teller or a high school girl. Do not even think about putting on that pair of white pants till Memorial Day. No, I don't care if they're on sale at Express, no I don't care if they're cute. No, I don't want to see your VPL.

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