Gay Marriage

Why are people even arguing about gay marriage. There's a simple solution here and I think we've all overlooked it... Give them their own "GayState". Yes, that's right, a place the gays can call home. They can get married, have kids (if they figure out how), they can use their own "gay money" and start their own country if they want. Their own "gay paradise". There won't be any of those awkward and funny moments involving "those breeder people". And everyone can do as much butt-sodomy as they want and no one will care. They can have gay orgies in the streets for all I care.

There's a few bugs to work out, and I'll leave that to the gay people moving there. Naturally they'll have to figure out how they're going to survive. It's hard when you have to train your kid to be gay, if you have one. Then if your kids don't turn out gay, you have to send them away to the Straight States of America to live. Then there's the problem of work. See, gay men can only perform a small variety of jobs: hairdresser, waiter, interior-decorator, and pop-star. And lesbians can only be pornstars, gym teachers, and golfers. The lesbians will have to fill in as garbage collectors sometimes too. But for the rest of the careers in this gay state, they'll have to hire in Mexicans or something. There, solves another problem. Look at how smart I am. In fact, we'll make California the gay state. They get one of the biggest states (we know how the gays love the big phallic things), most of the gays are already there, and most of their Mexican slaves (I mean supplemental employees) are there too.

This is such a great idea, I can't believe we didn't think of this before. Now, to shoot an email over to President Bush to get the ball rolling. "See Mr. President, it doesn't mean you condone the gay lifestyle, you're just separating yourself from it, while giving them something they wanted all along."